July 12, 2020

FAITH WITH FEET—WHAT WE SAY AND WHAT WE SOW
July 12, 2020
Charles Billingsley

Can you think of a time when you’ve said something that was totally inappropriate, mostly because you didn’t stop to think? Arguments, stupid questions…they all come back to haunt us, don’t they? How long has it been, yet you still remember?

Open:

Today we continue our series, “Faith With Feet,” from the book of James. James wrote practical advice and instruction that is not too difficult to understand—but may be very hard to carry out! For instance, “ joy in tribulation,” :be humble,” “ be slow to speak, quick to hear”—and the hardest for some of us, “be slow to get angry”! Today we will concentrate on the tongue. Do you consider yourself (as Mary Poppins) “practically perfect in every way”? If so, you have your tongue under total control. Is that possible? James says it isn’t. Let’s open to the third chapter of this amazingly down-to-earth book of the Scriptures.

Focal Passage: James 3:1-18

BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU SAY

  • Read James 3:1-2. Why did James use the term “we”? What if someone does not say anything that he has to regret? Is this possible?
  • Read verses 3.-5  What three examples does James liken to the power that is in the tongue? What do each of these have in common?
  • How many of you have had experience with a horse and bridle? If so, you know they do not like the bit in their mouth, and yet without it, what would the horse do? What is the analogy to the tongue?
  • Can you think of other examples where something small or insignificant  on its own can have consequences that may result in catastrophe?
  • What are some uses of the tongue that can destroy another person? What are some examples of words that can build someone up?
  • Read Proverbs 20:19, 16:28, and 17:27-28, How does God feel about gossip?
  • Read verses 7-8. Why does James say the tongue is full of poison? Can you give an example of hurt that happened in the past that scarred you?
  • Read verses 9-12. What are some examples of Christians who “speak out of both sides of their mouth” (as the saying goes)? Is there one that bothers you more than any other?

BE CAREFUL HOW YOU SAY IT

  • Read Proverbs 15:23. Do you know someone like this, and what is so special about them?
  • Read verses James 3:13. What two character qualities does James point out here? Why do some people feel the need to assert to others that he has those attributes? When someone boasts on himself, do others see that?
  • Read Proverbs 15:23 and Psalm 141:3. What are some ways we can seek to put these into use in our everyday lives?
  • What are some ways we can build up people who cross our paths during the day, whom we don’t know?
  • Read verse 17. When you have something you want to say, is this a good list to hold up against your comment? Even more so, are your actions in line with this list of heavenly wisdom?

FOUR THINGS YOU CAN’T RECOVER FROM YOUR WORDS

1. The word after it’s been spoken

2. The blow to the heart after it’s been delivered

3. The pain from the blow

4. The scar that it leaves

Close:

Have you ever played the (old) game “Telephone”? Everyone is in a circle, and the first person whispers a sentence to the next; they, in turn, whisper it to the next person, and so on until it has finished going around. The last person repeats out loud the sentence. Generally, it is nothing at all like the first person began it. That is a perfect example not only of rumor or gossip, but also how our words—to us—sound plausible, but the hearer may interpret the words to mean something completely different. At some point, most husbands and wives need to say, “What did you just hear me say?” in order to keep an argument from beginning. In fact, if something important is being discussed, that it is an excellent communication skill that avoids potential conflict with anyone!

It has been assumed a fact that financial problems are the biggest causes of dissension in a marriage. However, if you take the few verses in the third chapter of James, one wonders if perhaps our words are not the thing that cause the most friction. Arguments can start with “You said…” “I said…” This chapter (and the next two) lays out the way to have a life of peace. As you bring up a subject for discussion, quickly run down the list in verse 17: is it true? Will it bring peace? Is it gently said? Are you open to reasoning it out? If the subject is not as you see it, are you open to being merciful about it? Will it be fruitful for it to be discussed? Are you open to being corrected? Do you have a sincerity about it? Those are great questions if it’s something that you want to have a good outcome! As 1 Peter 3:10 says, “He who would love life and see good days, let him refrain his tongue from evil, and his lips from speaking deceit.” That’s taming the tongue in a quick synopsis!