May 1st, 2022

Family Matters: Marriage Made in Heaven

May 01, 2022

Pastor Jonathan Falwell

When we do things much the same way, every day, it’s easy to go onto “auto pilot” with some of our actions. How do you practice taking “intentional” time in your marriage, rather than habit?

We are now in a new series, “Family Matters.” Today we will look at marriage from God’s perspective, and see if ours follows His pattern. The perfect marriage that He ordained when He created Adam, a male, and Eve, a female, was forever destroyed when they chose to sin. Can we still have a great marriage? Yes! It won’t be perfect, but it can be great with His help.

Honoring Spiritual Roles

• Read 1 Peter 3:1b-2, 5. What was God’s perfect plan for a perfect marriage? What is the role of a wife? When the word “submission” is used in this context, what goes through your mind? If you think logically, would God ever mandate a law that would denigrate a woman, to whom He gave beauty, value, and the incredible worth of carrying the next generation to birth? Why, when He loves us so much, are we so ready to believe He makes women of lesser value as a person here? So, what does He mean? Are there ways in which you submit to Christ now, even when you’d rather not? Then why do you? Is this the same type of submission?
• Read 1 Pet. 3:7 and Eph. 5:25-26. How is the husband to love and treat his wife? What are the consequences if he does not honor her? Have you and your spouse ever sat down and discussed these verses? If not, why not?
• Can you think of examples of a man rebelling against being submissive to God (Eph. 5)? What is God establishing with these relationships?
• How does a man lead?

Rejecting Cultural Pressure

• Read 1 Pet. 3:3-4. What are some outside (cultural) influences that women in the church can get caught up in? How can those influences destroy a marriage?
• Read Matt. 5:6. How would all homes look if the husband took the spiritual lead, the wife served him with love (as unto the Lord), and brought the children up with love, boundaries, and an expectation of obedience? What are some ways in which children can ruin the relationship of the husband and wife (mother and father) because of cultural pressure?

Following Christ’s Example

• Read 1 Pet. 2:22-25. Let’s ask ourselves how much are we like Jesus: Are we ever deceitful? Do we ever retaliate or threaten, when attacked? Do we always have to have the last word? Do we always have to be right? Do we contradict almost everything our spouse says? If you answered yes to any of these, repent, tell your spouse you are very sorry, and start afresh!
• Will Satan eventually give up on trying to ruin our marriage? Why will attacks keep on happening as long as you are trying to know and serve God better? Read Eph. 6:12 and 1 Peter 5:8. Do these verses explain the attacks?

Recognizing the Enemies

• One thing is sure: if you do not recognize the enemy, you may let him in. Read 1 John 2:16. What are the enemies listed here? List all you can think of that will try to wreck your marriage. Did you list competition? Lack of forgiveness? Money?
• Read James 4:7b. What are some ways you can resist the devil?

Implementing the Remedy

• Read Heb. 12:1. Can anyone share if the sermon caused you to have seen an area that you need to work on, for the sake of your marriage?
• What are some options available if some feel it is too late and they think their marriage is over?
• If you are going to do the right thing, what ONE thing does that involve?

Why do wives get so upset when it comes to submitting to their husbands? Do they fear being beaten with a whip? God has a perfect plan for relationships: Jesus is under the authority of the Father; the husband is under the authority of Jesus Christ (or is supposed to be!); the wife is under the husband, and the children are under the parents. In your job, if you can think faster, or are somewhat smarter, than your boss, does that mean you become the boss? No. You are hired to work under him, and hopefully have a good relationship where you can explain your thought processes, but it does not give you authority over him. A general may not be as smart as some of his privates, but he’s still the one who has the responsibility by reason of his role to lead the others. It should be a comfort to a wife that she can let her husband make decisions that relieves her of many responsibilities. If there needs to be a conversation about a situation, if both are striving to please God, that conversation should be productive and the marriage made stronger. The point is, a great marriage is very hard work. It doesn’t get easier the longer you’re married. Sometimes it just means you have learned to put up with each other’s faults. That, too, is not God’s best. His will is that both you and your spouse desire to live before Him with a hunger and thirst to be righteous (Matt. 5:6), a desire to live pure and holy lives (Rom. 12:1), and a desire to serve each other as Christ served the people with tremendous love, having compassion on them, throughout His ministry, and with His sacrificial death.

Why is it so hard? Because we tend to sweat the small stuff; because we remain so exhausted from all our busyness that we don’t have much left when we get home; because the world beats on our door through social media, technology, comfort food, and the list goes on and on. In the end we have to remember, it is not people we’re fighting, not even our spouses. It is Satan, who is going around like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour. If he can get you and your spouse, then he can get your children, their children, and possibly their children’s children. Are you strong enough to stop it, do what is right, now, and turn everything in your marriage in the direction of Jesus Christ?